Kids can often have emotional outbursts when feeling frustrated. Shouting that they hate something is likely an in-the-moment reaction.
It’s important that you listen to your child, but what do you say in response? You don’t want to invalidate what they are feeling, but you also don’t want to give in to their refusals. After all, reading is critical for learning.
Whether your child is reading for school or for entertainment at home, here are some constructive ways you can respond to their struggles with reading and get them back on the right track.
Give Them Options
It is easy to link your child’s angry outburst to the activity they are currently doing. However, a frustrated exclamation about reading being boring or hating reading might be more about when they have to read rather than about the task itself.
Take a moment to calmly talk about what they would rather be doing at that moment. If it is sunny, they might want to play outside. If they have just walked in the door from school, they might need a snack to refuel before starting other tasks.
Give your child a chance to go and do their preferred activity, provided they return to their reading once it is complete.
Offer to Read with Them
If your child is new to reading, or if they struggle to sit still for extended periods, reading may feel overwhelming. Offering to sit and read with your child may help them feel more comfortable. You could offer to switch off reading pages aloud with them (they read one, then you read one). Listening to you will help them understand how fluent reading sounds. Or, if they read to you, it will help you identify if they are struggling with any particular words and gently correct them.
Find Out Why They Are Saying It
If these outbursts happen regularly, it might be more than just a bad mood for your child. If their book is too hard or too easy, they will find it difficult to be entertained by the story. If they are reading in a noisy or distracting place, they might be overloaded and unable to concentrate.
Make sure your child has a book they are interested in and a quiet place where they can read, and see if that changes their feelings.
If your child is struggling to sound out new words, talk to your child’s school and find out how things are going in the classroom. Make sure the school is using a research-backed phonics curriculum to teach reading.
Make Reading More Fun
Too often, kids see reading as a chore rather than a joyful activity. If you have a reluctant reader who says, “Reading is boring,” try to make it fun for them.
Make sure they always have a fun book that they have chosen. Kids have so many choices made for them that the chance to pick something for themselves is freeing. Their fun book could be a joke book, a graphic novel, a comic, fiction, non-fiction, or whatever they want it to be.
Explore the Feeling
A feeling is something that passes. When your child says, “I stink at reading,” help them rephrase that as a feeling. It isn’t that they stink at reading, it’s that they feel like they do, and you can help them with that.
This tool validates a child’s struggle and acknowledges their intense feelings while helping them understand that these feelings are not permanent.
Talking about feelings might be challenging for children, especially young ones, who aren’t as good at describing their emotions. When emotions cool down, see if they are ready to try again.
Read in “Chunks”
Reading for 20 minutes may feel overwhelming for your child. If so, try encouraging them to read for 10 minutes in the morning and 10 minutes in the afternoon. Breaking reading into manageable chunks can make it more appealing.
Don’t Dismiss Them
It is a natural response to calm your child’s fears by saying, “Oh, don’t worry about it.” Although you might say this with the best of intentions, it might not help your child manage their frustrations. After all, they are worried about it.
Instead of a dismissive comment, react with empathy. Let them know that you’re sorry they feel this way and then offer some of the options above.
As you encourage your child to develop lifelong reading habits, make sure your child’s school is supporting your efforts. If you’re looking for a private elementary school in Atlanta that helps foster strong reading habits with phonics-based programs, contact The Academy of Scholars for more information.
Infographic
Children may have emotional outbursts when frustrated, often expressing dislike in the moment. Discover in this infographic constructive ways to support your child with reading challenges, whether for school or leisure.
